relate to others is an art that, like all art, must be learned
I'm working on experience face-to-face or interpersonal communication, I present to you a few lines and then close the book by Henry Cheli that I feel extremely interesting and emerging. He proposes these things:
1 - Learning to relate
2 - For communication "healthy" you must switch from self-awareness of the other
3 - Communicate = express + active listening
We can represent this simultaneity between expressiveness and listening through the symbol of the Taoist Tai Chi You, who represents the dynamic interaction between the opposite and complementary principles of Yin (female side of the communication) and Yang (masculine side of the communication).
Explanation of symbols:
- Half white : 's expressiveness . Here is a small round black area that reminds us that while we can express, and we must also listen: listen to us and listen / observe the reactions of others.
- Half black : 's listening. Here is the white circle and reminds us that while we hear a lot of messages at the same time we express no verbal signals of attention, contact, approval, but also of inattention or dissent.
R iflettere on some of these ...
"Relations with other deeply affect our physical well-being and can be made to make us happy or bitter, angry, depressed, and can even lead to the development of real psychosocial disorders, psychosomatic and psycho-emotional "(Cheli, 2008, p. 1)
" We are in a transition phase in which people wish to orient their relations in light of new needs, new hopes, new values, but still have not learned a new and more appropriate ways to communicate and relate and above have not developed the ability of self-determination, using their knowledge to make choices, instead you blindly follow predetermined routes by others "(Cheli, 2008, p. 42).
Seven steps to transform their relationships: (Cheli, 2008, pp. 46-48)
"Interpersonal relationships as a mirror of the relationship with oneself"
1 - Recognize that there is a problem and an inconvenience, if you do not recognize that things are not going well as we would like and pretends that everything goes well we will have no motivation to change.
2 - Knowing that you can improve and that it is never too late to do so.
3 - Learning about the causes of socio-cultural, psychological and communicational these issues.
4 - sharpen self-awareness, the ability to bring conscious attention to what is happening inside and outside of us, to realize what is happening within us and around us as soon as it happens, and emotional detachment, that is, as if looking from the outside. [...] Only by understanding their own emotional reactions and internal conflicts we can really understand those of others, only the consciousness of our masks will help others to get rid of them, so as to create a report that is spontaneous, sincere and constructive.
5 - Ability to view other people abscission and relational situations that we live with them.
6 - to distance themselves from their habits of communication relationships, breaking the identification.
7 - Develop a confident and positive attitude towards the existence, seeing it as a continuing source of learning for which every event, every situation, every relationship can teach us about life and especially about ourselves.
P er go deeper: Cheli E. (2008), Interpersonal relationships, Milan, Xenia.
